Michael Deane
Counsellor and psychotherapist. Eighteen years of this, and a first career that had nothing to do with it.
How I came to this
I spent my twenties and most of my thirties in logistics. I was competent at it and it paid for a house. I would not say I thought about it much.
My father died when I was thirty-six, over about four months, and I found that I had no idea how to talk about any of it. Not to my wife, not to my brother, not to the people I worked with, who were kind and asked once. I got through it the way most people do, by not really getting through it.
Two years later I started training, mostly to understand what had happened to me. I ended up in a hospice, which is where I learned the actual work: that people mainly need somewhere to put things down, and that this takes far less cleverness and far more patience than I had assumed.
I am comfortable with silence. If you go quiet, I will not fill it for you unless you want me to.
What I am like to sit with
Quiet, mostly. I ask a lot fewer questions than people expect. When I do ask something, it is usually because I have not understood, not because I am steering you somewhere.
I am direct. If I think you are avoiding something, I will say so, and you are free to tell me I am wrong. If I have got something badly wrong, I would rather know.
I do not talk in the language of therapy. No inner child, no journey, no holding space. If a psychological idea is genuinely useful I will explain it in ordinary words and you can decide whether it fits.
I do not give advice about your life, because I do not know enough about it and because it almost never helps. I will help you think, and think out loud, until the thing you are circling becomes clearer.
Who I work with
Adults, individually. A lot of people in their forties, fifties and sixties. A lot of men, though the practice is open to anyone — see the page on that for why it is worth saying at all.
I do not work with couples, families, or children, and I do not offer assessment or diagnosis. If that is what you need I will say so early and try to point you somewhere useful.
Training and registration
- Training
- Postgraduate Diploma in Integrative Counselling, University of Brighton.
- Registration
- Registered Member of the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy.
Membership number available on request and shown on the BACP register.
- Experience
- Eighteen years, including eleven in hospice and bereavement services.
- Supervision
- Monthly clinical supervision, as required by the BACP Ethical Framework.
- Insurance
- Full professional indemnity insurance.
- Further training
- Complicated grief, trauma-informed practice, and working with men in therapy.
The BACP Ethical Framework governs how I practise, including confidentiality, record-keeping, supervision and complaints. You can read it on the BACP website, and you can check my registration on their public register.
If any of that sounded right
The first step is a short conversation on the phone — 20 minutes, free of charge. No obligation on either side, and no pressure to explain very much.
Or read how it works first, if you would rather know the practical details before making contact.